Can you be happy while in pain?

Can you be happy and at the same time feel like you’re going through something awful, that’s ripping at your muscle of faith, and squeezing your hope into a dark hole?

Yes.

I am.

Cuz there’s a part of me that has a reserve of faith, I never run out.

My imagination keeps pulling me away from what I see in reality and deep into what I feel is possible.

Call to yourself what you feel is possible, no matter how things look to everybody else.

 

Michelle Bernard’s – My prayer – a moving meditation. from Michelle Bernard on Vimeo.

I am in love

I am in love

with

my imagination.

The relationship I have with it now as an adult with a bank account,

mortgage,

and mutual funds

is more challenging than the one I had in my basement when I was 13.
I would lie in my bedroom with wallpaper-flowers, the Prince record blasting up to the kitchen, letting my mind play pictures and fantasies of what I wanted to experience.
Wishes and real-feeling scenes so far unlike the Iowa town where I lived.

It was ritual – to daydream. Daily.

I called it planning.

As a grown-up

I remember

my imagination is still my best partner, my friend

when I stop making it my enemy.

I understand

I must pause

breathe

and dream the same way I did in my bedroom with flowers.

A daydream, a plan, a mental massage that I truly love.

Do you question yourself?

Are you a writer?  Artist?  Choreographer?  Entrepreneur?

You know how it feels to come to the page, surface, floor, computer and make art and business happen.

You know how it feels to make money or not.

You know how it feels to question yourself, devalue your worth, need to create, wish for help.

You know how it feels to have a zillion good ideas.

You know how it feels to finish a project or start a bunch of projects that never fully make it to the END.

You know how it feels to never even START to bring a great idea to form because your queue is backed up with emotion and sabotage.

write every day

I’m writing a book [among other creative things].

Why?

Well, the answer is difficult to explain.  I’m writing a book because there’s no space within me that doesn’t want to write it.

But there is doubt, fear, pause, perfection, terror [bigger than fear], wonder – all exhausting me from tapping out the words.

I’m moving like a snail.

self-confidence

This helped like a gift from GOD[DESS].

[beware of maybe 5 or 6 S-bombs... cursing!}

Elizabeth Gilbert keeps helping writers and artists make peace with the creative nature.  

And this {JK Rowling} gave me another perspective.  It gave purpose.  

{The good part comes after her opening}

You will be gently stirred by these thoughts on the craft.

get more

We’re always trying to get there, to make it!

So much self help is focused on teaching us how to help ourselves to more.

Get more. Have more.  Earn more.  

 

 

Maybe we could use a bit of help learning how to feel good about what we have.  

Right now.

What we have.

 

And not for any other reason than to feel good right now.

Call it gratitude.

 

Gratitude has become another puffy word, like the words authentic and love.

We toss these words up and fumble to catch them.

Why have they become so hard to hold, gently?  

Could we let them sit within our grasp without squeezing so tight and slipping out of our hands?

 

I invite you to hold gratitude with both hands, with your thoughts, with your BOD and be still. Carry it. See it. Feel it.

Bring it up closer to you.  Take a breath.  

Maybe you’ve missed something.  
Maybe you’ve been out there looking for more when there already exists so much more within you.

Feel grateful not because you’ve learned that doing this will work to bring more to you (though it might), and not because it makes you a good person (though it pretty much could), and not because feeling grateful is a strategy to change your energetic vibration (although it pretty much will).

Don’t feel grateful simply because you wanna ” make something happen”.

Feel grateful because it can illuminate the parts of you and your life that you may have overlooked

(due to all the wanting).

Feel grateful because this moment matters just as much as your next, just as much as 6 months from now, just as much as when you do have the right boyfriend, enough money, perfect abs, a promotion. 

This moment is happening.  It’s your life.

Be in it.  

You and your life are worth Celebrating just as is.

You have made it!  Here.

You are already here.

http://www.sculptedbybernard.com

i wanna be big

you’re a big boy now
mr. porter/

turning 9 today
that’s 63
to me
still just as centered and calm as when you turned 4

(28).

porter2

i named you after a bodybuilder, PORTER CATRELL

though your strength is deeper than BODy

small children
they pull on your ears
fingers closing near your eyes
you don’t react –keep licking their little hands

on the airplane

(under the seat in front of me)
you’re quiet without medication-
only need a “shhh, it’s okay… i love you”/

good boy

a Manhattan dog needs rules.

taught you at 5 months old
no bark in the morning, you’ll wake the neighbors
so you grrrr instead, underbite protruding from your tight black lips

michelle and poerter!

mr. porter, my model
of
ease

you are my display of ZEN each day

you are a big boy now

so zen, michelle bernard with mr. porter

i wanna grow

to be big

as you are naturally

michelle bernard's dog

michelle bernard's mr. porter

show and tell

We’re a quarter of the way through this glorious year, mate!

Remember your big dreams for 2015?

They are worth your attention and discipline!

 

For many of our goals, we need to assemble with groups of like-minded, focused, tenacious souls who simply recognize our greatness and cheer us on.

You and I, we can do that for each other… right here!

 

Here are a few of my beLoved goals for the year:

✘ Publish my book for sale on Amazon

✘ Submit articles to my favorite online magazines like Rebelle Society, The Phoenix Soul, Blackberry A Magazine

✘ Use my TRX once a week

✘ Do scorpion pose

✘ Get THE WANDERING PEBBLE up and filled with art

✘ Make a fitness/wellness video every month!

Expect to see a new VID here every month!

 

So please, join me in fulfilling your passions.

 

What do you want to see come from your vastness of possibility?

 

Tell me.

Then come back through and show me your realized goal!

 

http://www.sculptedbybernard.com

when i open my eyes

when I open my eyes,

before my bano visit,

before the oatmeal in my wine goblet,

before I qualify whether I got enough /didn’t get enough / need more

sleep

(no worry cuz I nap for at least 10 minutes every day!),

 

when I open my eyes

and take a morning breath 

I, then, say

thank you

thank you

thank you

 .my morning ritual.

 

what’s good?  every day.

what’s good?

get centered and listen to your answer.

 

http://www.sculptedbybernard.com